Tag Archives: Boxing

Stand Out

Each of us defines success in a different way.  My definition of success today is being content, loving those close to me with a full heart and enjoying life to the fullest.

One of the things I like to do is speak to people about life and what they can do to accomplish their dreams and goals.  I listen to their stories and try to find the commonalities with others who have become successful in life.

I was speaking with two people, in particular, this week with very different lives, yet their stories share common threads. One is an actor who started out for many years as a carpenter first. He studied acting on the side as he worked his woodworking craft.  He lived frugally and held himself to a high standard. He pushed himself and never lost sight of where he wanted to be.  There were no roles available for guys like him, yet he never gave up and today he is in a number of shows working as a full time actor.

The second is a professional athlete who has worked at his craft his whole life.  He reached the top of his game and still he kept at it.  Even when his career started to wind down, he stuck to his personal code.  He faced tough times and many changes, but with each move and shift he learned and grew. Those tough times helped shape him and equip him for his life today coaching and pushing other athletes to reach their potential.

We can all learn from their stories.  First, they each had a clear vision of where they wanted to be, and worked toward it.  They did not get caught up in the small things that drag us down in life and will do nothing for us.  Second, they demanded excellence from themselves.  They went to bed early, got plenty of sleep and woke up early on a schedule.  Each of them was willing to sacrifice immediate temporary pleasure for their long term goals. They were willing to put as much time as they could possibly find into mastering their craft.

In doing this they cracked the code of success that many others have followed. Hard work at every stage. They gave it their all no matter how small the work seemed at the time.  People took notice because of their hard work.  Good work never really goes unseen, even if you feel like it does not matter at the time.

After many years of toil, when they finally had their big opportunity, they were ready.

Another thing that stands out to me about these two, is that they both give thanks to him who made it possible. They will tell you that God will never give you more than you can handle.  Their advice is to stay focused, do everything to the best of your ability, demand excellence from yourself and make no excuses. By following these guidelines, we can all reach our full potential.

Titus 2:7

Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity,

1 Corinthians 9:24-25

Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable.

 

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Thrive

Here in the United States, we have access to so many things that can enrich our lives, yet many of us never take advantage of any of it.  We all have free time, we all have resources around us – libraries, museums, job opportunities, educational opportunities.  Yet most of us would rather spend our time complaining about all of the things we don’t have and the opportunities that are not handed to us, than to go out and create opportunities for ourselves.  Why?

Did we lose the art of believing that anything is possible with hard work and determination?  It can be easy to forget that we are all truly blessed to live in a place where there is an abundance of food and medical care is always available in emergencies. Instead, we all want more, we feel we deserve more without putting in the effort to earn it.

If we spend any amount of time watching TV or poking around on social media, we will be quickly reminded of the things we are lacking.  The truth is, those things are not necessary to achieve our goals.

Life is always better when we spend our time believing that we already have the things we need to enjoy life and pursue our dreams.  Don’t wait until you achieve your goals to believe in yourself.  Believing you can’t thrive until you have reached your goal is a mistake, we need to thrive during the journey. To think otherwise only fills our days with negativity.  

I am healthy and alive and thriving, even though I have so many goals left to achieve.

The fault in my old system of belief was that I thought everything – both good and bad – happened because of me or to me.  I gave myself too much credit – I believed the world revolved around me.  It is hard not to laugh at myself now looking back.  

I believe that if everyday I put in my best effort, it will pay off in the future.  That doesn’t mean life won’t hold struggles, but it means that I can still thrive during life’s struggles.  I know life as it is at this moment is just temporary and will change sometimes for the better or worse. I believe that no matter which way life may go, I am well equipped to handle it and will continue to thrive.

Romans 15:13

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope.

Hebrews 11:1

Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen.

 

Destination or Journey

Often we focus on the destination with so much intensity that we completely forget about the journey. Each of us has a unique story that goes along with our journey in life.  We are exactly where we are today because of the roads we have chosen.

In 2005 I could have never imagined that I would end up in the Midwest.  I became adapted to living the big city life during my time in New York, and the minute I left, I missed it.

I spent a lot of time in a mountain state after that, but I never enjoyed it or even considered living there.  I spent all of my time training, writing, reading and on Fridays, watching movies.  That was probably the longest time I spent living away from a coastline, until now.  Los Angeles began as my home in my early years, and became my home again.  It was the place I thought I would live the rest of my life.

Looking back, the funny thing is that I do not miss it at all.  I was going over all of the choices big and small that brought me to where I am in Illinois today.  I do not regret my past because it shaped who I am today.  I regret certain choices and actions I chose.  I never dwell on my past in a negative way, because it shaped the person I am today.  I am thankful for my journey and most of all, that I survived.  

I learned a lot of things the hard way. The lessons of my life come from experiences both good and bad.  Now, I hope to pass on my experiences to anyone who cares to listen, and save them the trouble of learning the hard way.

I lived in a state of constant dread.  A life of,  “What if?” or, “How long?”  Even after I began the change process, I still felt uneasy all the time. Looking back, I will sometimes catch myself wondering why did I not seek change sooner.  I know now that it is because I was not ready and God’s timing is perfect.

My journey taught me that we can all accomplish what seems impossible as long as we are dedicated to improving and staying the course.  We may not get exactly what we set out for, but what we do receive will be more than we could have dreamed.

Destination or journey? The real prize is what we learn along the way.
Jeremiah 29:11

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.

Psalm 119:105

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.

 

Live Boldly

I heard the phrase “live boldly” this weekend, and thought about what a great motto it is for life.  I decided I needed to investigate it and dig deeper.  The dictionary defines bold as not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring.

That definition can mean a lot of different things to different people. In the past, I would have taken this as a sign that my way of life was good.  I was going after what I wanted, without fear or remorse. Today I still want to live boldly, but I expect more from myself than that selfish approach to boldness.

Are you a slave to your desires? Let’s approach it another way.  What do you, as a person, stand for?  Perhaps you know deep down what your answer to that question should be, yet you find it easier to live your life taking an easy path.

I have many goals, and I push myself to reach them without cutting corners.  One thing I struggle with is putting my own goals and desires before other people’s.  The values I’m working to live by, those found in the Bible, tell me that is wrong.  So I’m working at achieving my goals while staying true to my values.

It is time to for us to live boldly.  To do what is right, not what the world around us thinks is right.  

I know this about myself: I will fail a lot of the time. Even when I falter, I will do what I can to honor God and live as He calls me to live.  The more I work on myself, the better example I will project to a broken world.  Challenge yourself and others to live life boldly!

Acts 28:31

Proclaiming the kingdom of God and teaching about the Lord Jesus Christ with all boldness and without hindrance.

Hebrews 13:6

So we can confidently say, “The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?”

 

Why Details Matter

Sometimes I like to just hang back, watch people to see what they do and how they act.  If you pay attention you can easily determine why some succeed and others fail at certain endeavors.

It has become easy for most of us to skip over the small details in life.  We live in a quick on the go society.  In reality every detail, no matter how small, matters. I have the luxury of hindsight because I am able to look back on my life and determine why I was successful at certain times. I can also be sure of why I failed at other incidents.  It comes down to the details.

Why are Vincent Van Gogh’s works of art so amazing and thought provoking?  After all anyone can paint a starry night.  In reality, very few can capture the mood and feel with a brush.

Last week I watched a championship fight between two fighters at the top of their game.  One of them was hit by a huge hook and right away he came back with a wicked cross.  The hook seemingly had little effect on the one hit.  Two still pictures reveal the reason behind it.

The hook was “winged,” which means the hips were not used and it was only a palm strike.  He didn’t hit with his knuckles, but his opponent did use his hips and turn over his punch.  Those tiny differences made the difference between being able to walk through a punch and being thrown against the ropes.

How many times do we fail to take each step we need to accomplish our goals? Are we using our hips to throw our hooks (hypothetically), or are we just slapping with our hands? I have been and am guilty as the next person when it comes to cutting corners.  I used to never worry about the small things, I always figured I could go back and fix them. This faulty way of thinking has cost me a lot over the years.  I think about all the time and heartache I could have saved myself and I realize how ignorant I had been.

We walk through life without realizing that God has provided us with everything we need to live a prosperous life of fulfillment.  It is hard because we cannot see the big picture or the final outcome. This is where faith comes into the picture and helps us get through the rough periods.  The good news is, that even though we can’t see the future, our job is not to blindly walk in faith, he has given us clear guidelines of how we should live in the Bible.

Our lives are made up of thousands of tiny actions that take place every hour of the day and night.  A chef cannot put a culinary masterpiece on the table without careful attention to each of the ingredients.

I listen when someone is explaining something unfamiliar to me and I absorb the information.  If I don’t understand something, I will ask questions.

I make every effort to do whatever task I set out to do right in the first place. I know I will fail at times, but I learn and I never continue to make the same mistakes again.

How could paying attention to details make your life easier?  The next question is why are you not sweating the details?  When we cease to learn, life is over.

Matthew 7:7-8

“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.

Proverbs 13:4

The soul of the sluggard craves and gets nothing, while the soul of the diligent is richly supplied.

 

Live Life Proactively

It took me many years to realize that I didn’t always have to wait around for life to happen to me.

It was a mindset that kept me in places that I knew well. My mind adapted to whatever my surroundings were at the time. I rationalized everything that was going on around me as being part of my life.  In my time as a criminal, I was like a feather in the wind going wherever the wind took me. In those days I had one single goal in life, and that was to pull down cash.

Life began to change for me when I made a decision in 1996 to get out of the life I was leading. I was no longer going to just go where the wind blew me, I was making a path against the wind.

In 2005 when I had accomplished my return to a normal upstanding citizen, I set new goals for myself.  I wanted to write a book, and make money legally. It turns out that was a terrible blueprint for my life.

I wrote the book and I became a successful businessman.  Yet, I had a feeling that there had to be something more to life. I changed my plan again, deciding to pursue something I had a passion for instead of just working to make money.  I also decided I wanted to take a stab at becoming a successful Hollywood screenwriter.  So, I started training people at a gym and began working in Hollywood writing screenplays.

This one question kept coming up in my mind, what do I really want? I kept telling myself money and a good life.  I knew that was not a real answer, it was a copout.

No matter how my plan changed, I still felt like I was missing my purpose.  I did a lot of soul searching.  My motto had always been “I am the master of my fate,” and felt like if I could just steer myself in the right direction, all would be well.  It turns out that was the problem.  I had to let go of my control over my life and put my trust in God’s plan for me.   That might sound like giving up to some, but the truth is I had to work twice as hard once I decided not to always do what felt good to me, or what I wanted.

In Los Angeles, I had all the connections I could ever want.  In Illinois, I have few. I live in the country. Yet, I have discovered that I have everything I need right here, and the few people I am close to enrich my life daily.

I finally know without a doubt what I want from life. I want to do God’s will, have a great relationship with my wife, improve the lives of those I have the opportunity to train and write books.

To have a great relationship with my wife, I have to constantly work on my attitude and my behavior.  I tend to think I know everything, and the truth is I don’t.  

I wrote my second book, and I have learned a lot of patience in the editing and rewriting stages.  

I dropped the distractions of wanting money and fame, and have instead started living my life investing in people: the people I train and the relationships that are meaningful to me.

2 Corinthians 9:6

The point is this: whoever sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and whoever sows bountifully will also reap bountifully.

Matthew 7:13-14

Enter by the narrow gate. For the gate is wide and the way is easy that leads to destruction, and those who enter by it are many. For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads to life, and those who find it are few.

Matthew 6:33

Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.

Special People

So many wonderful people have come into my life. I was thinking back to the summers I spent as a child in Franklin, Tennessee and the memories I took away from that time. It was there I spent time with my grandmother, great aunts, and great uncles. I remember those times fondly and I remember the stories they told me. Those are great memories that will last the rest of my life.

Think about the family and friends who have impacted your life.  Some came and went, others are still in your life today.  Some friends make an impact for only a season, and as you both grow, you drift apart.

Another kind of friendship is the long term friend who we keep in touch with but only see infrequently because of life and distance.  Yet, every time you get together it is like no time has passed. Think about how much they have added to your life over the years.

I was reading The New York Daily News on Saturday and a headline caught my eye. I read it and I realized that one of the people in my former life was taking a plea deal for some of the things he did back when I knew him. My first thought was, “I am so glad I no longer have anything to do with those people.” Then I got angry at myself for ever getting involved with that life.

It came to me then, that it was all part of my life.  I had lessons to learn. I needed to be around that person’s cousin so that I would see the path I was on would only lead to a dead end. My being around them was a valuable lesson and without it I would not have the life I have today.  I would not be the same person with experiences that I can use now.  It’s not a waste, God can use my bad past for good.

Even a bad encounter in your life can be used for good.

The special people in our lives are important in forming our values and personalities. Enjoy the time spent with them and let them know how much you value them.

I have had those close to me pass away and today I no longer grieve their passing. I think about all the experiences I shared with them. I know I was lucky to have been able to have them in my life.  Choosing our circle of friends carefully today is very important to our future.  

The journey of life is long and there will be many who come and go. When we grow, we must know when it is time to let go.  We can keep fighting it or make it easy.  Remember, you never know when you might cross paths again along the way. I believe that when we encounter someone it is because God has a purpose for it in our lives at that time.

Proverbs 27:17

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another.

Proverbs 13:20

Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.

1 Corinthians 15:33

Do not be misled: “Bad company corrupts good character.”